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As a devoted yoga practitioner and
instructor, I've noticed an interesting trend in myself as well as my
students. The mind will revert back to old, deeply rooted patterns,
and will put up quite a stink if you challenge those patterns which
once served you so well.
By putting up a stink, this sometimes
means an all out tantrum, fists pounding on the floor, stomping your
feet, wish you could scream out loud if you weren't such an evolved
adult who would never act such a way in front of other evolved
adults. "You want me to wrap my leg around my neck like a
scarf? I don't think so.....,"
I see it in my student's faces after
I've just cued a new variation of a pose the body has never done
before. The jaw tightens, the shoulders rise toward the ears, toes
curl on the mat, eyes twitch, and so on..... ultimately leading to
tightening of the throat, the breath's passageway to oxygenate the
muscles and connective tissue surrounding the bones, leading to
deterioration of the pose. By the word deterioration, I mean giving
up in frustration. Another common occurrence is for the deep yoga
breath, which soothes the mind and helps relax the body, to revert
back to old, shallow breathing patterns similar to how the body
responds when receiving an adrenaline charge.
The body moves into survival mode, not
wanting to do something new or challenging which is a coping
mechanism for safety and self preservation. Or, is it the mind which
moves into survival mode not wanting to do something new or
challenging? It's hard to differentiate which mechanism is getting
in the way of the other. But that is one of the beauties of a
devoted yoga practice, an increased awareness of noticing how
responsive the mind and the body are to new information, new
situations.
I first noticed this trend in myself
when as a beginning yoga student, my instructor would cue the class
into crow pose week after week. My mind would say, "you've got
to be kidding me, crow pose again? doesn't she have anything better
to give us than........." and off my monkey mind would go,
swinging from one tree branch to the next. Before I knew it, the
class would be dutifully and beautifully experiencing one of the most
rewarding poses yoga offers, while I would be gritting my teeth in
consternation at my lack of strength and courage to try a pose in
which I could possibly fall flat on my face.
Hmmmm. Fall flat on my face. That's
not a very pleasant thought. I'm much happier playing it safe, not
taking risks, letting others make fools of themselves if they choose
to fall flat on their face. And that's when I noticed the pattern.
My yoga mat became a mirror of how I act off of my mat, when faced
with something new and challenging.
I began to see how patterns and yoga
have something to do with each other. Yoga brings to the forefront
of your awareness the patterns you've adopted to survive as a human
being. Patterns of the body such as eating, sleeping, sitting
postures, standing postures, how you hold the muscles in your face
etc., Patterns of the mind such as your relationship to food, how
you view sleep, how you show love to yourself and others, how you
protect yourself, etc., As your awareness of your body's patterns
increase, your awareness of your mind's patterns increase. And vice
versa. This kind of feedback is crucial for anyone interested in a
deeper understanding of why we act and react the way we do. When
given this kind of feedback, the mind and body can work together to
create new patterns that are more beneficial, patterns that help you
grow and evolve past the old patterns that no longer serve their
initial purpose.
As the mind opens to possibilities, the
body responds in kind. It's quite a beautiful process to see unfold.
Maybe crow pose isn't so out of reach after all. With time, I can
explore my body's strength and flexibility while also exploring my
possibilities and boundaries in a way that honors my true essence.
The benefits of exploring my possibilities transcend the yoga mat and
have a far reaching affect on how I approach my life, my goals,
dreams, and aspirations. Life becomes new and exciting again as I
learn to also honor my potential.
Crow pose still gives me a slight
twinge of fear before fully engaging my feet off the ground. Ahhh,
but once I do, I can't help but feel that sweet satisfaction that
comes from knowing I've faced my fear and overcome. That doesn't
mean I didn't fall on my face a few times. I'm learning to be more
flexible with my expectations of what I'm willing to explore versus
playing it safe. And I'm learning how it's good to laugh at myself
once in a while and not take life so seriously to where I've become
immobilized by fear, inflexible......
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